The reasons why supporting children through grief and loss are important to me

I have observed and experienced a gap in support services for parents and educators that support children with special needs through grief and loss.

As a teacher, I never received training or education on how to support my students if their parents were divorcing, if a loved one died, or the student moved from another country. Teachers are always told to refer the child to a guidance counselor or a social worker, when in actuality, the teacher is the one that supports the child the majority of the time at school.

My middle son, Derek, has overcome many obstacles in his life and he continues to inspire me. It was because of his Pre-K ESE teacher that I became a teacher. Derek's early years were filled with trials. He was born 2 months premature, had a developmental delay, didn't speak until he was 4 years old and when he finally began speaking, he had a stutter, and he has had challenges with his health. When Derek was 8 years old, our family was faced with the traumatic and untimely death of my 8 year old nephew, Alfredo. My son lost his best friend and the one peer that treated him like he was “normal”. Derek was as "normal" as anyone, but he didn't feel that way around kids his age. What does "normal" really even mean? As a parent, I had to search for answers on how to help him face this traumatic loss, as well as how to help his teachers support him.